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. [Tuesday, June 5th, 2012
@ 10:48am]

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maybe we'll call it "beauty" [Saturday, October 18th, 2008
@ 4:39pm]
[ mood | calm ]

what's to leave to wondering
when im over the top you hate it
and when i'm not you're complaining
that it's time for me to release what's under my utter most shell
to hell with these outter most coverings, well
i can only take so much
of me giving myself shit
for settling so slowly and cruising so smoothly
into something i should've cranked on the clutch
and pedalled some metal for
the eye of the beholder has become a blind metaphor
and what lays inside has turned out a frog
i pray god and whomever his lady be nice enough in lust
that they would birth a new baby for the rest of us to love
and maybe call it actual
call it Michael if that gives you thrills
but lets not call it beauty
for that gives me chills
and goosebumps on brown skin is less than desirable
i'd swing this chariot low but it'd been thrown a high pitch about an entire mariah-full
so here, here's a red blanket to hide our now riled bull
but Torro thinks tomorrow is worth bowing his head and raising his horns
i'm saving my sores to help fuel me tomorrow when i'm bathing in suns at the seasons of four
you may still beg of me to stop being so open
but maybe i'll call it beauty and what's prime will match what has been dying to be spoken aloud
and now is aloud
i'm potent and proud of the tales of my totem
they show much dirt
they show much pain and negative cuts
in evidence whats on the ground surrounding is wood chips
but what stands above astounding is something and somebody that never stood for the sake of bullshit
because i birth the baby and i called it beauty
i never gave it dates to infiltrate my nudies
and get under my skin to find what was within
i just let it teach them what was mostly without
and thats being sincere.

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gone again. [Friday, October 10th, 2008
@ 12:13am]
[ mood | aggravated ]

You’ll Miss me like Christmas -
..Claus’s wife.
And won’t wait like its the eve
in the evening light.
You’ll wish like it’s your last
and you’ve used them twice,
that I’d come back like seconds
when the mood is right.
Blink twice with your arms crossed.
Thoughts entice
how I’m the type to pay attention to.
The cost is right.
I’m not a barker.
Think my bite is much stronger
than the outer skin
of the trunks you find
birds nests inhabiting.
But you can’t have back
the realest shit you’d ever seen.
You’ll wish that I would never leave
like an evergreen.
But really
I am only onto much better things,
I won’t spell it out,
I’ll just design flyer lettering.
Your pace is just a back peddle
far too often.
A leg trap I give a crap
to get my laces locked in.
So take that, take that,
like its Puffy talking.
You can go on running shit,
I’ll leave this fucker leisure walking.

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Women and men [Monday, September 29th, 2008
@ 3:30am]
[ mood | accomplished ]

No I'm not cheating. Nor have I, but I've been working on this for 2 days.

He freshened up,
turned and said,
“I’ll let your bredrins fuck”.
I just shut up,
thinkin’, I’d been pimped for just enough.
We parted ways.
I ordered wings from hooters,
honey glazed.
Me not amazed..
He was downing shooters,
Killing trays.
But we equated -
plus me minus money
buying booze,
equalled getting faded
as my oldest denim blues.
I folded tens in twos,
I bent my waist to lace my shoes.
Dudes were watching places
they thought they could stick and move.
Soon enough,
we were back to spooning, wrists in cuffs.
Tuning up, tooling,
Drinkin’ brews in Dixie cups.
I asked him after
why his acts to bate a master mattered.
He sat up quick with laughter,
Tried to get his answer gathered.
I told him “Nevermind”,
Like Kurt and Courtney kinda Love.
Shoot, I would draw the line
so long as he would sign above.
My older cousin urged me
“E, don’t ever save-a-hoe”
Even if it's a dude in the sense
Fucking up your mood with his scents
He was “waiting” for his girlfriend,
and had “just a day to go.”
‘Cause “She had gone abroad for school,
just coolin’, while I stay on the block .
Local college bitch who had the fools follow and flock.

And we’re engaged”,
had I known I would’ve parted ways,
instead of making waves to beat his heart and part my legs
But I digress.
He layed in bed,
My head next to his chest.
He took a breath and gathered what it took to tell the rest.
He said,
“When she gets home tomorrow
I won’t be a wreck,
checking all her texts to see if evidence is left.

The president’s been set,
we won’t be meddling in threats.”

He swallowed once and laughed
like every truth was all in-gest… ed.
“I only wanted
our relationship to be the best.
Try to pick it up where she and I
had always left…
…it.

I can’t expect it to be smooth when all the stress… hits.
But I won’t ask her ’bout the dudes that she had slept… with.

‘Cause I'm that brother, man!
Forever under covers, man!
I’ve come up with the upper hand.
leave a bitch with dick
but not a crutch to stand”.

I was feeling used,
seeing blue,
Heart pounding purple.
“I’m not tryna be hurtful,
It’s just a case of role reversal.”

I let him up,
had better leverage to the cup.
I took a sip and watched the bathroom
door behind him shut.
he had his mind made up,
never adorned the cover-up.
I adored the mans worth
and paid no mind toward his slut.
he cracked it open,
balls and back no longer really showing.
Me putting on my ankle-socks
had barely got a toe in.
he said,
“If she was out there fucking everything that walked,
And playing pipe with dudes while I'm posting on the block,

then everybody’d say she was
just acting like a man,
And I’m the whore?
E, I don’t understand.

It’s the excuse of where your fucking gender lands.
Damn.”

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Playaaa [Monday, September 22nd, 2008
@ 11:07pm]
[ mood | calm ]

I aint a player, but I discuss a lot about
How the men seem to mistrust a lot…and I aint
Tryna be a hater if you crush a lot, and all the
What and not… but the fronting’s got all the
guys in a slump, they’re giving up their stumps, but
Wont even fuck with my muffin tops…and
Now they can’t see all the love I got cause they
Think that I’m a player…
I got the high tops…a casual flow, yet
Sophistifunk: skinny jeans I go…vneck chillin'
…my hoodie on smash sucka, I stay illin'
Heart on my sleeve…I’m wearing it well…my
Butt in the jeans; take me home to Moms,
Gladly she’s pleased with the look: some bitch, but no
Crook; not bad matter fact, all good, and I
So would love to be that…if I could…but for
This, I’m clean-cut-off, straight shut off: no
Play…no such luck when us two touched;
Yoplait Dairy King ain't dig these fruit cups, no
Gay, ooh shucks, we’d hang like two nuts : ) but the
Hood on me’s frowned upon like I’m Ku-Kluxed, so the
Good in me’s downed and um…life is too much
So now I’m drowned in Patron, out on the town in a
Zone, with any resolutions found in a poem…and holmes
The best solution seems destitute…I plan my
Next two moves…and see what’s best to do…just some
Connect or proof, cause I thought I was the best to boot, yet
One day they’ll like you and next wont even mess with you...and
Though this shit sounds like I’m blaming him, I’m okay with
Him…if I could, I’d be engaged to him…and
All around, I’ve restrained, and calmed it down to
Give him a page of this while I take a page from him…
I realize through my teared eyes that he
Fears lies…and engineered lines,
Guinevere-d minds…the shining Prince charming
Turned to something a lot alike to a bitch's convinced harming…
A good girls honesty is a bad girls deceit, cause
I could harmlessly, yet boldly approach to speak,
Only being sincere, yet really can’t compete cause
Another girl has run game and told it all as cheap…
Withholding all the peace…married to this main, not a
Playa’s lifestyle, I aint married to this game, don’t
Play a pimp cup sip; drunk in a haze, cause what’s
Within cause could fill up a stadium in praise, I
Insist love, please don’t resist love…check my
Commitment…see I’m persistent…read my
Intentions… peep my credentials I’m prolly the best bruh, for
Real, the next up…but guess what??? he thinks I'm a player.

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